I have this friend.
She has this gift.
It's pretty rare.
And I envy her.
She has this amazing ability to laugh at herself.
Caught in blunders. Using cliches incorrectly. Or simply breaking out in gales of laughter over a story where she's made a complete ass of herself.
She wears this big, genuine smile without a hint of red in her face. She's as comfortable with herself as a broken in baseball glove.
I think about myself.
I have a curse.
It is definitely not a gift.
And I am not proud.
For not only have I ignored this art, I often find my first reaction to be defensiveness.
"Did I misspeak?" "Are you sure?" Face floods with red...
When I get caught in an embarrassing situation my first thought is how can I get out of this with the least amount of humiliation?
The funny thing is, defensiveness just makes the situation grow. Like blowing up a balloon, it gets larger and larger.
Whereas, my girlfriend's approach diminishes and makes light of a situation. It quickly passes with a shared laugh.
It was what drew me to her. It is magnetic. Maybe because so few people have mastered this skill.
We are all so serious these days.
Where has our sense of humor disappeared to? Where is it hiding? Is it somewhere buried deep inside ourselves or is it nowhere at all?
There is potential to unleash it. To let go of our pride, our ego. And relax. Not everyone is judging you as harshly as you judge yourself. In fact, most people don't even care.
I was playing badminton with my girls. The birdie was hit high and deep. I stumbled backwards in an attempt to reach it. I fumbled. I fought. I fell.
There was a moment of silence.
And then I broke out into whoops of laughter.
10 comments:
It is a magnificent thing isn't it? That quiet brand of confidence born of a strong, healthy sense of self.
I love being around people like your girlfriend. They make interaction so effortless. There's no walking on eggshells around people like her.
There's very little that you might accidentally say that could wound her or provoke her to respond negatively, because she realizes that at her core, she is who she is, and no one thing or external event can shake that sense of self.
She realizes that her life, and who she is as a person, is a function of who she has been and intends to be over time, not in any one instance.
So long as she stays true to herself, no misstep to the left, right, or even backwards will significantly alter her long term upward and onward trajectory.
I'd love to be that girl.
Laughing at oneself is certainly a great gift...one that my mother has mastered. She has often been misunderstood because of her accent. Third graders would laugh as she told them to get out a sheet of paper because it sounded like "shit of paper." She once told a newspaper reporter of the beautiful beaches in the Philippines and what the reporter heard was that there were lots of beautiful bitches in the Philippines!
Great post. Its good to laugh at yourself. I know I beat myself up over mistakes and when I do I make more mistakes. When I just let it go and relax things are ok. Glad to have you back Sarah.
There are some things I laugh at myself for easily. But when I am speaking seriously about something, and someone decides to make fun of the way I pronounced something or if I did mispeak, I act like I did it intentionally. I can't laugh at myself for that.
But tripping over my own feat, reading something that is nowhere on the page, poking myself in the eye, those kinds of things I laugh hysterically about.
We all have those areas that we don't think are nearly as funny as others do.
I sometimes crack my own self up does that count?
I have to laugh at myself! Born a clutz so had to learn the hard way. I am so glad you are back to inspire me!
If I wasn't able to laugh at myself, life would be pretty miserable. I can't count the number of times I've made a fool of myself.
Laughing isn't a consequence, it's a cure!
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to got make a fool of myself...
I have to laugh at myself... if I didn't I would probably be depressed... haha.
Unfortunately my fiance doesn't find my embarrassing moments funny... he finds them embarrassing. So he tends to make an ass of himself... by not laughing at my make an ass of myself...
I can relate to John's comment about his mother. Being from the Philippines myself, I often mispronounce, misspeak words. I often have problems with the synthax structure of my sentences being out of order. Laughing at myself does lessen the effects of my embarrassing moments. This is a very good read.
I've added you to my blog roll. Hope you don't mind.
Great post, laughter is the best medicine in my book. I am very hard on myself and though I can laugh at myself and I do often it is difficult to do it in those moments when it will have the greatest affect.
So I keep funny quotes, videos, books, pictures at hand to get that laughing bug started and my mind off of the stressor. That usually helps me put everything into perspective. :)
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